Give me developing hormones, a cracking voice, a pony of a penis, Justin Bieber shag-do…. I would hurl myself at the chance to be a 12 year-old boy who can bitch slap Lady Gaga all over her own song.  By now, everyone has seen Greyson Michael’s performance omnipresent on the Internet, talk shows and little girl’s screen savers. I wasn’t going to,  but I just had to post this! He’s crazy talented at such a young age with a surprisingly deep voice for pre-puberty.  Did his parents do a little experiment with Annie Lennox’s eggs and Justin Timberlake’s sperm? I’m wearing a white polo shirt with red stripes right now… I’m single-white-tweening him…… that sounds very weird coming from a 33 year-old woman.. perhaps illegal… let me rephrase….

Girl, you’re not alone if you wish to give to birth to a kid that has this type of talent. I could see myself being a psycho stage mom if this were my kid… although, I would insist on being the back-up singer/dancer/ tambourine player on his world tour hence ruining the child’s career…. so this kid could never happen to me in a healthy parent-child relationship kind of way.. this dream is dead.  Perhaps one of my nephews will grow a passion for the piano and singing.. they both love my rendition of “Bushel and a Peck,” ….. Aunt/Manager…. this could happen.

Anywho, if you have a kid with talent like this…  or know someone who does…. I just want to see it! Send it to me!

12 year-old boy that sings better than Lady Gaga, you just might NOT be alone.

Let’s not beat around the bush. Erica and I jumped the ferry to Martha’s Vineyard and rode the “vacation” excuse like a wild horse and never tamed it. Erica had a goal to eat lobster at least once everyday and I fell in love. Yes, Rob, move over, you have been replaced by a much more enticing species… called.. Murdick’s Fudge. Slap me… harder.. no harder!! Okay.. that was too hard. Actually, not hard enough! I’m in still in love with fudge!! Ladies, this stuff is amazing! I live next to the Fudge Pot in Chicago, always loved it, but Murdick’s Tanya Harding’s it to the ground.

http://murdicks.com/fudge/

I had a love affair with fudge and Erica with lobster. HOWEVER, what did I say last week? I WILL NOT GAIN WEIGHT.. so I ran like vegetables were chasing me, EVERY FREAKIN’ DAY! Although we didn’t lose anything, we didn’t gain either which is pretty darn good for people who swam in butter and cream for a week. We did watch our food intake during the day, but when dark came… ohhhhh, Lordy.

When I arrived home on Sunday, though, I was greeted by the September issue of Shape magazine reminding me that vacation was over and the gym awaits.. as well as the veggies.

I got some good recipes this week so I’m not just eating things that taste like cardboard:

http://www.shape.com/healthy_eating/10_minute_meals

I’m hoping for a 4lb weight loss this week which would put me at 146lbs! I haven’t seen that weight in years. Don’t forget, this Sunday I post Week 7 results so you can heckle me if I don’t lose that amount! It’s fun to heckle – I can take it.  Bring it.

I was doing Jazzercise.... at a bar

Even at a bar on vacation… Erica is dedicated to her cardio!

It’s 3am and I had to submit this story because it just happened. I was at a swanky bar with some friend’s after work and I met this hot guy while getting a cocktail at the bar. We talked, I was interested, he was interested. Later on, when I looked in my purse to grab my phone – it wasn’t mine! It was a strange phone. I was like, “How did this happen, did I pick up someone else’s phone??” A few seconds later it rings I looked down and noticed the number was familiar – it was my number. Oh good, I mixed up the phone and the other person is looking for there’s. Wrong. I answered and it was the hot guy at the bar. He told me he switched them on purpose and if I ever wanted to see my phone again, I’d have to come and get it. I thought, is this really happening? This happens in movies, not in real life. But, he gave me his address and away I went.

My thought was that the guy obviously wants a hookup otherwise he would have just asked me on a date. I’m not a one-nighter kind of girl so I struggled with my decision of partaking, putting on the slut hat. I walked up to his house – nice place – and knocked. It was completely dark. I heard someone yell, “Come in,” so I did. Candles were lit everwhere and there was a trail of socks – YES SOCKS – as a marker to lead me into his room. I found him naked in his bed with my phone on his stomach. You could tell that he put a lot of effort to get in a sexy pose. Not even the worst part – he had a bottle of KY jelly and condoms on his night stand. ABORT! I grabbed my phone very quickly, replaced it with his and started to bolt. Of course he yelled after me and I could hear him scrambling out of bed, but I was too embarrassed to see him naked again!!

This just happened. I’m laughing at it now, but I’ve got to tell you, when I started typing I was so freaked out!
Here’s to laughing at uncomfortable situations.

Tara
Memphis, TN

Hello Lovely Ladies! Heather here. For those of you living in Chicago, I hope you are staying warm and dry, who knew it was monsoon season in the City? This week’s topic is Exposed!

To shake things up a bit, our lead story comes from a lovely and talented friend of ours, Charla. But don’t fret, Lauren and I will keep you entertained throughout the week with more of our tales and yours. Enjoy!

Over-exposed at Cartier:

So I’m invited to the oh-so exclusive Palm Beach Cartier Christmas party and decide to fully glam it up festive style and wear my “red threat dress”. You know the one that makes you a threat to all the attached ladies in the room to hold onto their man cause you’re such a hottie one?

Yeah, well, it was body skimming, short (I had the legs for it at the time) and loooow backed with a drape front, only supported by two teeny tiny spaghetti straps at the shoulder (I had the back and arms for it at the time too.)

Ok, so what do you do at such a Christmas party but grab some mighty tasty and expensive (free) champagne, try on jewelry you DO NOT have the bank account to purchase, but hope that your date does then go and ask Santa (hired entertainment) to bring you the said wish list for Christmas, right?

Well, that WAAAAAS the plan until, while carrying champagne and handbag in one hand, pashmina over the shoulder on the other side, I strut my way up to Santa and low and behold the pashmina on my left shoulder starts to slide. In order to stop it, I’d have to spill or drop the champagne glass (lead crystal, of course) so I figured if I just try to stand a little taller it’ll stop the fateful slide. WRONG! It proceeded to fall of my shoulder and take my dress strap with it! Even worse, my dress dropped below my waist on the left side so that my boob, sans bra, was staring at Santa, his elves and the rest of the Christmas party.

Needless to say, I didn’t return the following year. Can you say “fashion victim?”

Charla, Chicago, IL

I have predicted text on my phone and was text-flirting with a guy. What I meant to say was, “Do you want to go out with me this weekend?” Well, if you hit “4″ then “6″ on my phone pad it types “go,” but can also type “in.” I was so nervous and knew if I didn’t type quickly then send the message immediately after, I would chicken out so I didn’t spell check. When I got a weird reply asking if I meant to send the message – I scrolled down and realized that my text had asked, “Do you want to in out with me this weekend?”

And for the record, he didn’t.

Hannah
Wichita, KS