I’m pissed. Frustrated. I want to step out of my body – turn around – and bitch-slap myself all over the place. I’m in a rut, ladies. Same as last week… I didn’t gain a pound, but I didn’t move down the scale either. The only reason I think I didn’t gain weight last week is because I had a dance off (by myself) last night for two hours which burned a crap-load of calories (and threw-out my hip. AND YES, it is a little pathetic to be doing this by myself on a Saturday night. Whatever.)  Oooohhhh… DISCIPLINE.. where the hell are you when I need you?? SHAPE – you are suppose to be my BFF?!? True, you are a magazine and not a human being, but for the LOVE OF BARBIE, DO SOMETHING!!!!! Have one of your models, trainers, or editors jump out of that freakin magazine of thinness and kick my ass back onto the weight loss track!!!!!

I’m stuck in my 40′s!! I’ll never see my 30′s, will I? Screw that – I just want to see my early 40′s!!! I am 148lbs and not moving. Just sitting here in neutral. NOT MOVING!! Why? Because I’m letting this mother of an economy and all it’s wrath bring me down to the land of wine, ice cream and couch sitting!!!!! CAN YOU TELL THAT I’M SCREAM-TYPING RIGHT NOW ?? Gods of Metabolism, HELP ME!!!!!!!

This is me screaming... and throwing an F Bomb.

Okay, breakdown is over. No more using work and personal problems as an excuse. I’m not going to type positivity, I’m just going to say that I’m getting my ass into the fat-eating gym, my hands out of the ice cream and I’m not replenishing my wine supply either! WHEW! I feel better.

I refuse to stay 148lb. I would be letting myself and you guys down. When I weigh-in next Sunday – I will be 145lb. I won’t except less!!!! I think this post/breakdown just helped me burn 500 calories because I’m winded.

Game FREAKIN on.