Hello Ladies!

Today is George Washington’s Birthday, it also just so happens to be mine too, making our collective birthdays a national holiday

This week’s topic is Electronic Catastrophes. In keeping with the birthday theme, I’ll jump right in with a tale of my own…

I consider myself a good party planner, so I decided to plan a surprise birthday party for a dear friend of mine. I had the location booked, a theme chosen, invitations were sent out, booze was purchased, you get the picture.

One week before the party, I was looking over the guest list and decided I should send out a quick email to remind everyone of the party, and to remind them to keep their mouths shut so no-one would ruin the surprise. The surprise was on me when I realized that I sent the email to the entire guest list, including the birthday girl!

We went ahead with the party, and all night long, I felt like the biggest ass. Who does that?! Oh right, ME!

If you have an embarrassing email or text message story, click on “Submit Your Story” and share!

Lauren and the Ladies – can I get a “GYNA-mite?”

I had two texts waiting for me. What are the chances they were from two friends, both with the same name, Jaime/girl and Jamie/boy?

The Jamie/boy said, “Great seeing you and your family today.” Note: conservative family man.

Jaime/girl had said the week before that she was going to be staying home over Christmas with her cat and fixing some kind of dead animal to eat….Note: she’s a wild/crazy fun girl!

So I accidentally replied to the family man…”How was your meat with pussy? It’s always a favorite at our house too!”

I realized what I had done immediately and kept yelling at my phone “no, come back, come back.” I haven’t heard from Jaime/boy in a while. Please let me know if you post this so I can have him read it and know I’m not totally creepy!

Pam
Janesville, WI

My girlfriend, Betty, was a bridesmaid in one of her best friend’s wedding. Betty and the Bride live in different cities, so Betty was sent to a store to pick up her bridesmaid shoes for the wedding.

Before going, the bride called Betty to let her know that the shoes were ready and in her size. All she had to do was stop by the store, try on the shoes and purchase them. Betty replied, “Great I’ll go get them today.”

When she arrived, she took one look at the bridesmaid shoes, took out her phone and sent a text message to her boyfriend about how UGLY the shoes were…she was so upset, in no way were these shoes going to look good on Betty…or ANYONE. Yuk!

As Betty sent the message, she gasped! She looked at her phone only to realize she had sent the message to the BRIDE!

After freaking out for a minute…and getting no response from the bride…Betty text her “OMG haha just kidding…did you get my joke? The shoes fit, all good!”

To this day, Betty doesn’t know if the Bride knew it wasn’t a joke.

Samantha
Seattle, WA

I’m a designer who had been working with a high profile CEO of a fortune 500 company. One day while at the airport, I glanced at my blackberry before turning it off to board the plane when I noticed he’d sent me an e-mail. I thought I’d quickly reply before shutting down. He had written to confirm an appointment at a stone and tile warehouse. He also copied the entire team to ensure that anyone who wanted to join him would be in the know. When replying to “all” – I THOUGHT I’d written “yes, you’re confirmed and please bring the sample TILE with you when you go so the staff will know what you’re looking for.” UNFORTUNATELY, I didn’t read what I’d written before hitting send and it turns out that my fumbling fingers were running amuck on my keybord as well as my brain; TILE had been typed in as BABE…and I’d apparently told the CEO to bring a sample BABE with him so that the staff would know what he was looking for.

Angela
Phoenix, AZ

I have predicted text on my phone and was text-flirting with a guy. What I meant to say was, “Do you want to go out with me this weekend?” Well, if you hit “4″ then “6″ on my phone pad it types “go,” but can also type “in.” I was so nervous and knew if I didn’t type quickly then send the message immediately after, I would chicken out so I didn’t spell check. When I got a weird reply asking if I meant to send the message – I scrolled down and realized that my text had asked, “Do you want to in out with me this weekend?”

And for the record, he didn’t.

Hannah
Wichita, KS

I was on vacation with my girlfriend and we had met these guys. I instantly connected with this one guy having great conversation that later turned into harmless kissing/petting. At the end of the night, we made plans to see each other the next day after kissing goodbye a thousand times. When I got inside the house, he had already texted me, “I can still smell you on me.” Did I mention we had consumed adult beverages? So, in my tipsy state (while hearing Barry White playing in my head), I decided to reciprocate with a sexy message. When I received his reply saying, “I’m coming back over,” – I scrolled down to see that I sent the message with a typo!!!!! It said:

“I can’t wait to smell you IN me tomorrow night.”

WHAT????? I meant to say “on” not “in!” Smell you in me? That’s gross!! He probably thought he was about to have crazy, nasty sex! I screamed for my girlfriend and we tried to fix the situation with a reply.

The next night I acted extremely lady-like so he knew I wasn’t some sex-crazed maniac. Well…..I acted lady-like for the first half of the night.

Gina
Hartford, CT

Spellcheck is tricky. It only checks for incorrect spelling of words, not word placement. We all text and email in a hurry from our phones, the majority of us have accidentally sent things we shouldn’t…. it’s totally common… as common as Miley Cyrus’ bluejean rump-revealers and overly smudged eyeliner.  It’s not as common, though, to misspell a word that makes perfect sense in a sentence.  That mother of a spellchecker doesn’t pick up on that…. not as smart as you think, huh, Mr. Spellcheck??!! 

But, never fear, our friend Lyndsey here is NOT ALONE.  My favorite part is that we got a real-time panic email from the stall. We’ve done something like it, Lyndsey! Email us and tell us how it went!

I’m emailing you from the women’s bathroom of my client’s office. I’m late to a meeting because of crazy traffic so I meant to email my clients that I was going to “pop” in the bathroom very quickly then meet them in the conference room. Instead, my fingers pressed too many o’s and this is what I sent: “I’m so sorry for being late, traffic was a bear. I’m going to poop in the bathroom real quick and I’ll meet you in the conference room.”

I just told them I was going to “poop.” I know, the longer I stand here in the bathroom, the more they think I’m really pooping. I’m frozen. I no longer have to pee and I’m trying to think of something witty to say. The only thing I can think of is , “I really didn’t poop, but almost did in my pants once I realized what I sent.”  Oh sweet Jesus!!